Engaged on the first date?! Yes, this story happened. Meet Marvin and Annika.
When the impossible is possible.
Hello Thirsty Friends,
While Richard Branson and Jeff Bezos just returned from space, I have another story for you that seems like the impossible is possible. This is a story of a couple, Marvin and Annika, who met online. He was in San Diego, and she was in Metro Manila. After two months, they met in the Philippines for a first date. On that same first date, Marvin proposed to her. And, she said yes.
Alright, we’re not vouching for fairytales or romcom plots like this one! Also, Ciari and I can’t promise that all first dates will lead to proposals. This kind of story only happens once in a while. But, it is a mystery worth unpacking. And, we’ve got some sound ideas that we can all apply to our personal lives. So, we’re sharing our top tips from this open and honest couple!
You can listen to the full conversation:
Or watch just 20 minutes of it:
So while Ciari is seeing someone in a similar timezone as Marvin and Annika, I’ll be working out how to travel to space because that’s much more of a possibility than a face-to-face date nowadays. Kidding aside, enjoy this conversation and the tips. We loved meeting this couple!
Cheers,
Ciari and Bea
PS. Thank you to Katz Salao for this amazing love story. If you know a unique story, message us on our Instagram. or email us at thirstyandthirty@gmail.com.
8 Takeaways from Our Conversation
Attention or attraction is not the intention. Be clear with your intention. Marvin was upfront with Annika that he was serious about her. And in less than ten days, he asked her to determine the relationship. He also deleted the apps and informed every woman he was messaging that he met someone.
Create a secret language. It’s a beautiful thing when you connect with someone. To embrace the weirdness of their situation, being in two different timezones, they coined the phrase: “Good weirdo.” as a substitute to “good morning” or “good evening.”
Be vulnerable. Talk about topics that matter to you. Marvin shared with us, ‘How can I get to know someone if I don’t let them in?” They spoke for hours and chatted about the idea of soulmates, their anxieties, and insecurities.
Think about this question when you’re looking at someone’s profile or messaging them: how long has this person been in their life journey? Look for maturity through experience, not their witty bio or hot photos.
21-Date Theory: Before you get intimate with someone, go on 21 dates. Not 21 days. We’ve mentioned this before, but we’ve never given a number to this. Sex and all that comes with it change the dynamics of a relationship. In some cases, a person can attach or detach themselves more. Take your time. It will be tough but worth it in the long run.
Let’s get married now. Date later. This lesson is by far the most bizarre but my favorite in this episode. Marvin bought into the idea that you can date after getting married, not just before as modern society dictates. The bottom line is getting married doesn’t mean you can get complacent with each other. Keep dating even after you exchange vows.
Let go of the settling mentality. Ultimately, engagement is the symptom of love and connection. We don’t need to compare ourselves to those around us. Or think we’ve invested too much time on someone that it needs to be forever. The fundamental questions here are: Is the connection there? Is the communication strong? And is the person mature enough to build a life together?
You do not need to put your partner on a pedestal. Just respect each other.
Something to think about
A morning thought: some of us need a boost of coffee in the morning. But don’t rely on that kind of caffeine. There’s something better out there: our relationships, friendships, and acquaintances. People depend on you. And vice versa. Care for them. Make them laugh. Be the caffeine for someone’s day.
From Someone We Love Right Now
If you get dating or relationship burnout like me, try Les Mills App. Sweat it out. Endorphins are the best thing since sliced sourdough bread.
This Week
Just this Sunday, we published an article on pandemic weddings & modern-day resiliency with couples. You can read it here.
Every week, Ciari and I set a goal to make our relationships better. This newsletter is for anyone that wants to improve their personal lives. If you have a friend that might need this right now, share this post.
Next week, we’re stepping a bit outside of love and relationships. We’ll discuss: equality is not always picture-perfect. This episode is in line with the recent campaign of Canon, featuring all men. We invited female photographers and other experts to chat about this pressing issue! See you next week at 9 PM, Live on Youtube. Stay posted through our Instagram.