In Episode 16 on The Big Orgasm, I kicked off our topic with the question, "Do you remember the first time you had an orgasm?" I was with three other girls in the show. Our laughter came out in chorus.
Despite the nervousness behind our laughter (Just like Britney Spears here), we did share some stories. At 13, I found a rental tape with the title, "Super Doll," which I discovered was not for children or teens. The plot revolved around a famous ventriloquist who slept with his supermodel looking fans. Needless to say, that image still sticks in my head with slight horror and curiosity. Another one of us on the show shared a cult porn classic, Pirates of The Caribbean. I had to ask backstage about Johnny Depp’s performance and confirm he did not accept the role.
We discussed our first encounter with orgasms and porn so awkwardly comedic that I wondered why our very own pleasure makes us uncomfortable? Why can't we straight out talk about it without laughing and feeling queasy?
Is it because we feel vulnerable? Or is there a stigma around the topic? Well, this is a place of no judgment. So, let's play a game to break the ice between us. Here are two truths and a lie.
Orgasms are natural stress and pain relievers.
It's an excellent way to find out what arouses you.
You won't be able to orgasm the natural way after using a vibrator.
***Insert Harry Meets Sally Orgasm Scene Here***
Orgasms are natural stress and pain relievers. TRUTH
One of the benefits of an orgasm is its natural ability to increase your pain tolerance. Studies have stated that it is an analgesic, which can suppress pain without affecting sensitivity to touch.
Using a sex toy is an excellent way to find out what arouses you. TRUTH
Everyone lately has been into mindfulness, self-development, and productivity. Well, there is nothing more mindful and self-aware than knowing how to make yourself orgasm. And a vibrator or any sex toy is the most productive way to do so. Forget your planners, habits, or gratitude journals. Get a toy and learn how to please yourself.
You won't be able to orgasm the natural way after using a vibrator. LIE
I've been a long advocate of people learning how to pleasure themselves. In bed, the other person is not responsible for your enjoyment. You are. And it starts by knowing yourself down there. Sometimes, women don't want to use a sex toy cause they think it would numb them. As long as you are healthy, you'll be fine—nothing to worry about. If problems persist, please see a doctor.
Ok, you're now comfortable with the topic. Maybe you want to share your own orgasm story. Please go on, send me a message here.
So while you think about telling me your story or not, I have to share with you secrets about women. Some have never experienced an orgasm, don't like sex toys, or have had to fake it. Some convulse into 50 mini orgasms in 5 secs. There are way more phenomena to the female orgasm versus the male orgasm. One thing is exact - the more you know, the better position you are in to enjoy an orgasm. So, I'm sharing with you an orgasm bucket list that might guide you, your friend, your partner, or some other person:
The Clitoral Orgasm
Clitoral orgasms run through the surface of the body, like a tingly feeling along your skin and in your brain. This type is the most common and achievable for women!
The G-spot Orgasm
Although G-spot stimulation feels different for everyone (and some people enjoy it much more than others), many people describe it as a more profound, fuller, more encompassing sensation. Think of it like a growing pulse or warmth deep inside the vagina.
The G-spot is an erogenous zone located two to three inches inside the vagina on the frontal side. When stimulated by a finger, penis, or toy, it can produce deep, intensely pleasurable sensations and even orgasm. Suggested toy: Tickler Rebel
Squirting or Female Ejaculation
Despite what you may have heard, you don’t need a penis to ejaculate! You need a urethra. Your urethra is a tube that allows urine to pass out of the body. It is also not as elusive as you think. More than 50% of women said that they had experienced this at least once!
The Cervical Orgasm
This one is a bit woo-woo but still exciting. In Taoist sexology, the cervix is known as the reflexology point for the heart. Physically speaking, this is the gateway of life. When a woman can open and relax in the cervical area, she can experience the most powerful orgasm of her life.
A cervical orgasm is more along the lines of what we call in Tantra a "full-body orgasm," or an expanded orgasm.
Nipple Orgasm
It’s fake news that you can only get off via private parts. You can actually orgasm through various erogenous zones, including your nipples. Men can have one too!
Stimulating the nips can trigger pleasure throughout your entire body.
Now you know the ABC’s of orgasms. Here’s an easy guide on how to achieve them. And, we have more lists for you—List One & List Two.
You only live once. And I suggest you get cracking. Try on your own, with a person, or with the help of a toy. Keep it fun and spicy.
Let me leave you with the words of the wisest: "Show me someone who doesn't masturbate, and I will show you a liar." -Ciari.
January News
We’re starting a READ SEXY book club! We believe being smart is sexy. So join us in reading our first book: Come As You Are (The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life) .
At the end of January, we will have a private ZOOM Chat to talk about the book and life. Email us at thirstyandthirty@gmail.com or send us a message on Instagram if you’d like to join.
Footnotes
Those who are keen to shop for a last-minute gift, go to Ilya’s online shop. Get a 6.9% discount with our code: thirstyforilya
PS. Thank you for our thirsty crowd that entered our recent competition. Ciari and I will announce the winner of the Svakom Trysta, the finest rabbit vibrator, this December 21, 2020, 10 PM Monday on Youtube. Merry Christmas!
Share This Email To Someone Who Doesn't Believe In Sex Toys, Masturbation or Has Faked It. They will thank you.